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Word on the street is that he did neither! And... he didn't wash his hands while he sang Happy Birthday!! How yucky is that?
(JICYDK, you should always wash your hands for a certain amount of time after pooping, and that certain amount of time is the same time it takes to sing happy birthday. But you must be careful to sing it at the normal pace, just like if you were singing at a birthday party. And when you get to the part where you say the person's name, just say "happy birthday to the poop I just excreted". That way if someone overhears you they won't think you are crazy, because it makes it clear that you are singing to an actual thing, and if they think about it, they will come to realize that you are indeed singing to an object that that was "born" on that very day.)
Good golly are you still reading this poop? I better get to work. I'm like 3 hours late. Where does the time go, you know?
(One other thing - "JICYDK" is my own invented shortened thing for "just is case you didn't know")
Oh, and also I didn't mean to imply that you're not hip to the "wash your hands after using the bathroom" thing, I meant jICYDK the Happy Birthday part.
Have a wonderful day.
Thank you for your insightful comment.

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