TAMPA, FLA -
Last night Russell Rhodes, that fun-loving morning anchor-guy on Fox 13 news in the morning, got into a little scuffle with an off-duty Hillsborough County sheriff's deputy. According to the deputy Russell was driving a little erratically in a parking garage. The deputy stopped Russell, who got out of his fancy-schmancy 2006 BMW "with his belt undone and his pants unbuttoned".
Based on the emphasis placed on this shocking piece of evidence that was observed and witnessed by a highly trained Officer of the Law, one can only assume that Russell Rhodes was drunkenly driving through the Channelside parking garage trolling for illicit sex with HIV positive male prostitutes.
Or, we can assume that Russell had just finished eating a big meal, his pants were a little tight because he's getting a little on the chubby side, and he just wanted to get a little comfortable.
Now the deputy's account of what happened next is indisputable, because it has been documented as fact by a highly trained officer of the law. The off duty says that Rhodes put his BMW into reverse AFTER he was already almost through the parking garage exit. Only a drunken homosexual would do that, so the deputy threw on the flashing lights. The deputy said that while questioning Russell, the gay ass morning anchor-guy started two walk away from him TWO times. The deputy also said that Rhodes refused to hand over his car keys when asked.
Then things got really wild. The deputy stated that Rhodes almost took off running out of the out of the parking garage, but the deputy grabbed him before he could get started. Apparently Russell was in such an advanced state of intoxication that he was unable to start running before the deputy grabbed him. The slow, clumsy movement of a drunk guy who thinks he's too good to hand over his car keys because he's on tv vs. the lightning quick precision reflexes of a highly trained Hillsborough County officer of the law.
So after the deputy proactively prevented Rhodes from fleeing the scene of a crime (there was a crime, right? oh yeah, that's right - his belt was undone) Russell began "flailing his arms". The highly trained deputy then felt it was time to "take him down". A spokesperson for the sherrif's department remarked that Rhodes suffered some highly visible injuries during the course of falling down like a drunken fool.
Apparently, while he was "flailing his arms" he punched himself in the eye pretty hard. And his jaw too. That must have a sight to see. But I bet cops see it all the time. I wonder if a) he wears glasses on TV, but not out in public (when he's trolling for gay sex) or b)he somehow removed his glasses while flailing his arms before he hit himself in the eye, or c) his glasses are partially embedded in his face.
Currently rated 1.5 by 2 people
- Currently 1.5/5 Stars.
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