Shari Mong, a 44 year old bookkeeper, managed to embezzle
$253,403 from her Manatee County employer, Environmental Plant Resources Inc. Apparently Otto Bundy, the owner of the company, has been pretty much immersed in lofty, idealistic pursuits, largely having to do with restoring seagrasses, while Shari has been concentrating on a more practical pursuit, largely having to do with stealing Otto's money.
Both Otto and Shari, it seems, excelled at their vastly different yet intertwined work. Otto, a University of Delaware graduate with a master's degree in horiculture, is credited with restoring thousands of acres of fragile shoreline, donating millions of plants in the process. Shari, on the other hand, is credited with quickly climbing the corporate ladder at Environmental Plant Resources, rapidly and single-handedly increasing her income from $39,000 a year to $120,000 a year. While Otto was working with scientists to restore and replenish eelgrass, a vital yet decimated variety of saltwater vegetation, Shari was keeping the company's vendors in line, by withholding payments, and diverting the vendor's money to herself.
In all fairness to Ms. Mong, she did repeatedly warn Otto that the company was in poor financial shape, and was badly in need of some type of cash infusion. And Otto, when faced with the warnings, eventually pumped thousands dollars of his own money into the company to keep it afloat.
Shari was ultimately done in by the same thing that got Al Capone - syphillis, eventually leading to blindness and dementia. No, just kidding there, actually she failed to pay sales taxes on merchandise sold by the company. And the state tax authorities, not knowing that the company was organized in such a way that Shari was in charge of the money while Otto was in charge of growing seagrasses, called Otto to ask what was going on with the missing tax payments.
And so Shari Mong, which may or may not rhyme with merry bong, was finally captured in the weblike trap of her own design, like a dog without a tail, or a fish without a scale. Or a hammer without a nail. Or a milk-maiden without a pail. Or a postman without any mail. Or a boat without a sail. Or a garden without any kale. Or a tavern without any ale. Or a pile of hay not in the shape of a bale. Or a storm without a gale. Or Captain Ahab without a whale. Or a scholar who did not attend Yale. Or a train without a rail. Or a mall without a Zailles.
And then Shari got put in jail. And out of the sky fell hail, and Peter Cottontail hopped down the bunny trail. And little boys are made of snails. And snakes and frogs and puppy dog tails. And Michael Jackson appears to be frail. And those little bumps on the ATM are actually braille. And I need to check my voice-mail. And eat some bread before it goes stale. And people who never go outside are often pale. And there's a folk singer named John Cale. And $280,000 was Shari's bail. And that is a comprehensive list of things that rhyme with tail. If you can think of any more send an e-mail. And I will ride my sled over hill and dale. And I will tell the world my tale. And suffering readers of this blog are beginning to wail. And arms are starting to flail. ANd I'm getting hungry so I'm gonna go eat an appail. And maybe also a bananale. And in this endevour I will not fail.
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