Lately, a largely unknown little niche community has been getting a bunch of publicity. I'm not sure what the members call their little club, but a fitting name may be "The Drew Park Middle-Aged-Male Self Fondlers Club". Sounds a bit awkward at first, but say it a few times and it starts to just roll off of your tongue. Unlike other well known middle aged men groups, like the Elks, or the Masonic Temple Guys, or the Rotary Club, the "Drew Park Middle-Aged-Male Self Fondlers Club" try to stay out of the public eye, and rarely hold fundraisers. And instead of holding meetings at Moose Lodges and church basements, these guys meet at places like "FantasyLand", or the infamous "Playhouse Theatre".
What these guys do at their meetings is just downright nasty. People who accidently witness their meetings are generally scarred for life, requiring daily counseling and /or lobotomies. The official term for the DPMAMSFC's antics is "lewd and lascivious behavior". The City of Tampa has decided to try to put a stop to the DPMAMSFC's "lewd and lascivious behavior", and that they will spend $132,714 to do so. How they came up with that amount is a total mystery. I guess there is a formula or something.
So what exactly is "lewd and lascivious behavior", you may ask. Well, "lewd and lascivious behavior" in this case, is the showing of one's own genitalia and the touching, or "playing with" one's own genitalia. When this is done in front of a cop it is called "lewd and lascivious behavior". Those poor cops. Imagine being told "we've got a job for you over in Drew Park".
Now keep in mind that the seven men accused of "lewd and lascivious behavior" have been arrested, but not convicted. Here in America, you are innocent until proven guilty. Here are their names:
- Marc Medina, 43, from Tampa
- Daniel Rodriguez, 31, from Wesley Chapel
- Oswaldo Feo, 42, from Odessa
- James Gammons, 64, from Apopka
- Michael Nardelli, 52, from Winter Haven
- Michael Zazzaro, 48, from Land O' Lakes
- Joseph Linkiewicz, 48, from Jupiter (where people are stupider)
Each of these men have been accused of exposing, and in some cases fondling their own genitalia in front of undercover police officers.
Remember, they are all innocent until proven guilty.
Linda Bolea, Terry "Hulk Hogan" Bolea, Nick Bolea, and Stephanie Ragusa were not involved in this incident.
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