Terry Anthony Putz, a 41 year old guy from Zephyrhills (yup, it's the place where they make that delicious bottled water) who apparently is confined to a wheelchair was arrested friday afternoon for "Resisting a Merchant". And also felony retail theft. REMEMBER: INNOCENT TILL PROVEN GUILTY!! For all we know this might have just been some kind of misunderstanding, you know?
According to WalMart and the cops, here is the story: Mr. Putz was kicked out of WalMart before, for some reason. So then Friday afternoon T.A. Putz rolls on in to the WalMart just like nothing ever happened before, like he was allowed to be there, you know? And then he proceeds to attempt to steal a bunch of steak, like $200 worth. Now steak might be pretty expensive, but that's still a lot of steak. I mean I might eat $200 worth of steak in five years, you know? Maybe even ten years. Well probably eight. No, seven. Yeah, I probably ate maybe $200 worth of steak in the past seven years. See, my wife's a vegetarian, so that pretty much makes me a vegetarian, you know? So anyway, this story isn't about my annual steak consumption, it's about this Putz dude and WalMart. So let's get back on track before someone says "tangent".
So Putz is trying to get out of the store with $200 worth of steak (allegedly) when this female LPO (loss prevention officer) tries to stop him. And the guy tries to make a break for it! In a wheelchair, for Pete's sake!! (who the hell is this Pete guy?? and why the heck is everything for his sake?? is he some kind of special guy, who get's all the sake that doesn't go to God, or Goodness?? I mean, it's either God's sake, Goodness' sake, or Pete's sake. Why not John's sake? Or Brian's sake? Or Paul's sake? Or Ringo's sake? WHY DOES PETE GET ALL THE DAMN SAKE??) oops, another tangent. Ran out of Ritilan three days ago.
So Putz and this female loss prevention officer get into some kind of tussle. And the cops came and took Putz to jail. But there is more to this story. According to my sources (a 28 word newspaper article), this guy Putz has been arrested twenty seven times for theft, and convicted three times. So I'm thinking "What the heck, Gregory Peck?" I mean, either this guy has one hell of a bitchin good attorney, or he is just often misunderstood. And I'm thinking, "well hey, the guy is stealing (allegedly) food from WalMart, and trying to make a getaway in a wheelchair!! How could he afford an attorney who could get him out of 23 arrests?? Ain't no way!!" I mean, you know the wheelchair is for real, cause if it wasn't, he would have just got up and ran away!!
So I'm thinking that WalMart is just trying to get publicity or something. Or maybe the guy is just not up to speed on standard checkout procedures. But the real question is this: resisting a merchant is against the law?
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